Proper 11 B + Defeating shame + 7.11.21

 


M. Campbell-Langdell

All Santos, Oxnard

(2 Samuel 6:1–5, 12b–19; Psalm 24; Ephesians 1:3–14; St Mark 6:14–29)

 

Ps. 24:3-4a: Who can ascend the hill of the Lord? and who can stand in his holy place? Those who have clean hands and a pure heart….

Those who have clean hands and a pure heart, the psalmist says, are closest to God. But in the complicated world we live in, how can we have clean hands and a pure heart? We can do our best to make our outward actions in line with God’s love and mercy, but what about the shame that sometimes resides in our heart and holds us back?
In the recent Disney movie “Luca,” we are introduced to a sea creature who meets a friend who lives on the island near his ocean home. He learns that when he gets out of the ocean and onto land, he looks like a human child. But he is afraid, because the humans in the town near the ocean fear and hunt sea creatures. His friend encourages him to be brave. First, they have an adventure trying to build a motorized contraption. And then as they explore the human town to find out how to get a Vespa. His friend Alberto tells him that the voice inside that tells him he can’t do something is called “Bruno” and that he must tell “Bruno” to be quiet so he can rise to challenges. There is much in the movie about being accepted for who you are and I recommend it to you. I think it is especially timely for disability pride month. And this story about quieting the doubting voice within resonated with me as I pondered the passages for today.
Because, the more I looked at the passages, the more they spoke to me of men and shame and the different ways we deal with shame in our culture. Sociologist and author/speaker Bren
é Brown has written a lot about shame in her books, but she acknowledges that for a long time her work was focused on women. Women’s shame often has to do with not feeling “enough” – pretty enough, successful enough, attractive enough to our partners, etcetera. But Brown mentions a moment when she woke up to the need to learn about the shame that men experience. (I must interject here that these categories might not work as well for non-binary folx so please take what does work for you- perhaps it is a mix of both.) A man came up to her at an event and challenged her to learn more about men and shame. And when she did, she found out that for men, shame was often associated with being perceived as a failure, weak, unable to handle situations or emotions, or wrong.[1]

So how do the men in today’s passages experience and/or respond to shame?

Let us begin with David. Now, David is a very complex character. He is beloved of God, and shows courageous leadership. He also has a dismal track record with how he treats women and sometimes he is not a faithful leader of his military. He makes mistakes and learns from them at great cost. Suffice it to say that Michal, his wife, now replaced by some younger models, might have had various reasons to be disgruntled with David. But setting some of that aside, this scene is interesting on so many levels. David sets up the new capital in Jerusalem, wants to center God in the new capital by moving the ark of God there. This is dangerous stuff and in the missing verses we learn that the power of the ark even kills a person when it is touched directly upon righting it. But David proceeds to transport it, now very carefully, with sacrifices every so often, and he comes into the city dancing before it. Now it is possible that his dance may not have seemed seemly for a king. Michal, a princess since birth, may have seen this as below his dignity. And so she publicly scoffed him, attempting to shame him. From what we can tell, David is so moved by God that he is not much moved by the shame. For all of his faults, he remains centered on God.

Now Herod’s story is quite different. Herod, unlike David, was not divinely anointed by a prophet, but had acquired his might to the throne through what some called dubious circumstances. So he was already set up to be motivated by shame rather than God’s justice and compassion. So when John the Baptist shamed Herodias and him for getting together, John the Baptist made Herod appear wrong. And Herodias may have feared that Herod would appear weak because although he had arrested John the Baptist, he quite liked to listen to him and was not willing to go any further in removing him on his own. So Herodias took an opportunity when Salome danced for the court to turn a trifle – a passing word of praise –into a direct political action. And Herod would have been publicly shamed if he had broken his word, however fleeting, to give Salome whatever she wished. So in this gruesome display of the danger of shame, John the Baptist is killed, his head the last dish of the banquet.

Now John the Baptist’s disciples show us another way in just a few verses. We do not know if they were a mixed group as Jesus’ was or mostly men. But we do hear: “When his disciples heard about it, they came and took his body, and laid it in a tomb.” In just a few words, we see a different way. Instead of taking life, or not caring for their leader due to shame or fear of failure, John’s disciples gather him and bury him. They show compassion in a world where cruelty reigns. Somehow it is fitting that even in death, John the Baptist, through his disciples, points us towards Jesus, and Jesus’ way of love and compassion. You might rightly point out that John the Baptist himself did not model that sense of compassion when he publicly shamed Herod, and it is true that had Herod not been so shame motivated that might not have been necessary. Jesus shows us another way once again when we declines to shame the woman caught in adultery. Once again, John is great, but points to Jesus who is greater.

Because our humanity is our strength, not our weakness. And when we acknowledge that, compassion reigns. In the movie “Luca,” at one point, the two sea creature kids are revealed after they win the race. And instead of capturing, injuring or killing them, their human friend’s father declares them the winners of the race. And despite a bit of resistance, they are accepted, and a couple of local “ladies” come out as fellow sea creatures. Responding to perceived weakness and finding strength are ways of showing compassion. This is Jesus’ way.

Moving away from shame and towards wholeness in this way may look like:

-Acknowledging our church’s role in the residential schools that caused harm to our indigenous siblings in the US and Canada.

-Reaching out in solidarity to the people of Haiti whether in prayer or otherwise to respond in compassion at the loss of their president.

-Prayers for those in FL who have lost loved ones, and honest conversations about building safety and whether our structures are truly safe.

-Seeing strength and not weakness in our siblings with disabilities and different abilities.

You may think of many more. But how can we look to others and most importantly inside ourselves and find compassion rather than shame today? Can we forgive ourselves when we make choices based on fear and shame? That is a step towards better choices in the future. Let us remember that when we come to the altar, ready to amend our life, then are we like those with our hands clean and our hearts pure, ready to begin anew in the holy presence. Ready for a life of abundant grace! Amen.



[1] Brene Brown, Daring Greatly, p. 90-91.

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