Lent 5 (B) + Touchable Jesus + 3.22.15

(http://www.cherylricker.com/2012/05/whos-the-judge/woman-with-jesus-small/)

Melissa Campbell-Langdell

All Santos, Oxnard

(Jeremiah 31:31-34; Psalm 51:1-13; Hebrews 5:5-10; John 12:20-33)

Remembering Malcolm Boyd who often wrote in this style, a meditative conversation with Jesus.

Jesus, we wish to see you.

We are rushing like the Greeks in this gospel reading, to see you.

To hear what it is you have to say to us.

To tell us about eternal life.
Whatever it is you can say, Jesus, to make this whole world seem better.

Jesus, we want to see you.

Not the great high priest on a pedestal, Jesus,

Although that’s what you are, too,

But to see you.

In the flesh.
But it is hard to see you like this.

With all your barriers down, knowing what you will go through.

Jesus, we want to see you.

But it is hard for us.

It is hard for us because we still have this idea that you are a white knight on a horse, or perhaps someone who can’t be hurt.

Yes Jesus, we take offense at the fact that you might be touchable.

You have told us you are human.

But here you come out, all “my soul is troubled”

And what are we to do?
That isn’t very helpful, Jesus.
We would prefer that you would keep such thoughts to yourself.

I mean, if you can be hurt, how can you protect us?
If you can die, how can we have eternal life?

Doesn’t the well of living water all go dry?

Jesus, we are here with you, with the Greeks and disciples too.

We are walking the road with you.

Because we wish to see you.

We need to know you.
But we don’t know what to do with your pain.

Some have said that if you hadn’t been hurt you could never save us.[1]

In a way, when you dropped all the barriers, you let love in such that it could win?

Is that true, Jesus?

It takes a vulnerable savior to save us all.

To live as one of us, and die and rise again and to show us how to love.

But also to die and rise again and to gather us all up into your loving arms.

To let all the barriers fall, like your tears in Gethsemane, so that everything might be taken up into your loving arms.

Is that true, Jesus?

Can you take all of the hurt inside us and embrace it, Jesus?
Can your arms take the pain of those who have lost parents, spouses, children?
Those whose diagnosis or prognosis points towards the valley of the shadow of death?

Can you handle it, Jesus?
When my heart is troubled, too, can you embrace me?
Will you embrace me in the end?
Because we want to see you.

I want to see you.

And I think

You will embrace us.

Your arms are stretched wide, wide as all creation.

You are reaching out to us, us who have you tattooed on our hearts.

You reach out to us, Jesus

Because

You want to see us, too.

You need to know us, too.

And that just takes all.

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[1] Ayanna Johnson Watkins, “Living the Word: Sunday, March 22, Fifth Sunday of Lent,” (Christian Century, March 18, 2015).